Gearing up for Ghana

     Just about 2 months left until the big move! Some big things have happened in the past month.  We received our diplomatic passports, which we will all need in addition to our regular passports (that’s 12 passports we’ll be trying not to lose, yikes).  Cracks me up that even the 3 year old will have a diplomatic passport, our little toddler diplomat 😂.  We managed to get all the kids officially enrolled in an international school in Ghana so they are ready to go for next year.  Definitely my first time walking into a bank and asking how the heck I send money to Ghana for a tuition payment.  I’m learning so many new things already!  We also lined all 4 kids up at a travel clinic to get their yellow fever vaccines – not the kids’ favorite day, but everyone survived!  The travel clinic handed us a big packet of health information on Ghana as we walked out the door.  Don and I exchanged glances later at home as we looked it over…a recent cholera outbreak in the city we’ll be living in, dengue, typhoid, tuberculosis, schistosomiasis…sounds lovely.  Actually, it sounds like we’re playing a real life version of the old Oregon Trail game…”you have died of dysentery.”  It’ll be fine, right?  We’ll just put tape over all the faucets to remind the kids (and ourselves), absolutely NO drinking/brushing teeth/etc. with the tap water!

     The biggest development is that we received our housing assignment!!!  Overall, we’re very happy with it.  Plenty of space for our family, close to the embassy, on a secured compound with a pool…lots of pros!  It just looks…not like any house in any American suburb, ever 😂.  My mom said it looked like a house in Minecraft, (which it totally does), so for the last week, we have all been referring to it as “The Minecraft House.”  My dad and a friend said they look like Lego houses, so maybe we’ll start calling the compound Legoland, we’ll see.  Makes me wonder if we’ll end up naming all of our houses we get assigned to in different countries!

     And finally, I’ve also been trying to discern what I’M called to do in Ghana.  For the first time next year, all 4 kids will be in school five days a week!  We will most likely also be hiring a housekeeper and/or a cook (very common in Africa to hire household help).  Which is a completely new stage of life for me, WHAT do I do with that much time???  Go back into nursing?  Focus on writing?  Volunteer?  Be available to help out at the kids’ school?  I’ve been praying about it every day, asking God to make clear to me what HIS will is for me in Ghana.

     Through contacts at the embassy there, I’ve been put in contact with a group of nurses, all from different countries, who either have worked there or currently are working there.  I’ve learned so much from them already!  That IV poles are called drip stands, and that when a wheel is broken on one, you just prop it up with a rock (US nurses, can you imagine the JHACO fits if we tried that here? 😂).  I’ve learned that they do not assign certain patients to certain nurses.  Instead it is more “zone defense” with all nurses being responsible for all patients on the floor.  And also, that the pay is so minimal that for us, it would be considered not even worth thinking about.  A Canadian nurse I have been talking to, who works full time in a hospital, says all she has ever received in payment is some rice and cooking oil.  There, working as a nurse is truly a selfless, beautiful act of service, not a job you do for a paycheck.  These nurses have inspired me with their willingness to give of themselves, never counting the cost!  I am still unsure that I want to go this route, as a Ghanaian license takes quite a bit of effort to get.  I would have to take a written test, like our nursing boards in the US, and then do a 3 month long full time clinical rotation.  An easier option is to get a 3 month temporary volunteer nursing license, through an organization like Operation Smile.  These do not require a test or clinical rotation, but would have to re-applied for every 3 months.  Before meeting Don, I used to spend hours researching different medical mission volunteer programs in Africa.  Then I met Don, and when kids starting coming (and kept coming lol), I figured that dream was not meant for me.  I really can’t quite believe that other path, which I thought was closed forever, is actually within reach now!

     However, part of me also feels called to use that time to focus more on writing.  This would also enable me to be home to take care of kids when they are sick, volunteer at school functions, volunteer with embassy related matters like helping newly arriving families get settled, etc.  Or, my favorite option, sit by the pool with a book and a margarita 😂.  Frequently, spouses of embassy workers struggle to find jobs overseas, so they often do not work.  I heard one wife describe herself as an “international wife of leisure” and that title just cracks me up!  I could definitely be one of those!  Please pray for me, both that I may know what His will is for me in Ghana, and that I may have the courage to act on that knowledge.

     Anyway, there’s a little info on what we’ve been doing and what is coming next.  I’ll end with a little reflection on how we’re doing right now.  As I mentioned earlier, Don left about a month and a half ago for a 3 month stretch.  Although solo parenting is not new to me (Don left for 9 months when our youngest was 5 months old, and then again for 4 months last year), it is always a struggle.  Check out my previous post, On the Meaning of Suffering, for more about that.  In a way though, his leaving coincided beautifully with the beginning of Lent this year.  A time of suffering followed by a time of joy.  Loss, sadness, even grief, but mixed with a twinge of hope.  Good Friday followed by Easter Sunday.

     I was blessed to be able to go on a retreat last weekend with my 2 middle girls while my mom watched the other 2 kids at home.  The theme of the retreat was “pilgrims of hope” and it got me thinking so much about that little virtue…hope.  We talk about faith and love all the time, but somehow I feel like that third virtue gets missed a lot.  It has taken me being in this stage of life to truly understand, man, what a BEAUTIFUL virtue it is!  These days without my husband are so tough, but I was in tears more than once during the retreat, just thinking about that day in June when he will come home.  After over 18 months (that’s over a YEAR AND A HALF!) of being separated during the last 3 years, he will be home for good this time.  No more trips, no more training, just our family, all together, embarking on the adventure of a lifetime.  Hope.  The belief that the suffering has an end, that something better is coming.  Even though the “better” is not here yet, just the thought of picking him up from the airport, seeing his face, knowing that the time of trial is OVER, hearing the squeals of the kids as they jump into his arms…I can physically feel it, a little foretaste of the joy.  That’s hope.  And it keeps me going. I think this is the first time I’ve ever understood how someone can experience joy in the midst of suffering.

     It must have been what kept Jesus going on that Good Friday.  Isn’t it what keeps us all going?  That no matter what struggles we’re going through, there’s a chance that things will get better?  It’s a virtue that all the saints must have had in abundance.  ALL of them went through unspeakable amounts of hardship…years of torture, physical pain, illness.  Yet they were joyful.  They had their eyes set on the ultimate hope, that of the life after this one.  They even accepted that their ENTIRE life would be suffering, believing fervently that the next one would be free of ALL suffering, and would be forever.

     And how perfect that this topic would pop up now, as hope is even what Easter is ALL about!  That no matter how much suffering we go through in this life, because of Jesus, we have HOPE that we will live eternally, forever and ever, with NO suffering.  That suffering every single day in this life is worth that prize.  I have to admit, I lost sight of the true meaning of Easter this week.  I was laying in bed last night, sad and honestly, even a little teary, thinking about Easter. Hiding the eggs alone after the kids go to bed (a job which is usually Don’s), video recording the Easter egg hunt in the morning as the only adult able to watch it, sitting down to Easter dinner, just me and the kids…it all just made me sad.  I mentally steeled myself to put on a brave face for the kids, to squash the sadness and loneliness and refuse to put a damper on the joy of little children on Easter morning.  Fake it till you make it, I’ve gotten good at that.  How quickly we humans forget things!  I lost the hope that had brought me tears of joy the previous weekend.  I forgot that the hope of eternal life is greater than any sadness we may ever experience here on Earth.

     Less than 12 hours later, even though I hadn’t said a single word to ANYONE about our Easter plans, two friends texted me, asking if the kids and I would like to join their families for Easter.  Turns out, God sees when we do lose hope, and is right there, waiting for the opportunity to give it back.

     So, hold on to that hope this Easter.  I’ll be holding on to mine.  To better days, both in this life, and the next.  

“More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.” Romans 5: 3-5.